Tina Fey Scar Detective

I'm not the only person interested in the origins of Tina Fey's scar. There are others. I know this. Many of them find their way to this blog, hoping to have their questions answered. Others are like Amberdextrous, a MySpacer, who admits to having the scar obsession. He writes:

"The current chief obsession of my life is Tina Fey's scar. I noticed it the first time I saw her and have been dying to find out what put it there. Unfortunately, my research only tells me that it was a childhood incident that she refuses to discuss."

Then there's some dude on a discussion board related to Tucker Max whose obsession with the scar takes a decidedly prurient tone:

"I wanna lick Tina Fey's scar. A girl with a scar on her face (not acne) has a story to tell. That's hot."

It's nice to know I'm not alone. In terms of interest in the scar, that is. It's not like I want to lick it. Well, under the right... Anyway....

"Don't leave home without it."

Remember when it was Karl Malden and his gargantuan nose encouraging us to use American Express products? Now that I think about it, I'm not sure he actually did the credit cards ads, he may have just pitched the travelers' checks. Hmmm....

Anyway, AmEx is apparently planning to upgrade in the spokesperson category. A brief entry at Canada.com reveals that the plastic (that's plastique if you're toting "platinum" status) provider will snag none other than the beautiful, witty and cryptically scarred Tina Fey as a pitch person.

The gossipy column in which the statement appears also spends time talking about Andy Dick's peeing habits and an upcoming Brad Pitt movie. If you're having a celeb-gossip jones, check it out.

Here's the comment pertaining to Tina Fey:

"Watch for Tina Fey in the next series of TV and print ads for American Express."

Short but sweet.

"The Detective" is still the #2 guy on the totem pole at Google for those searching with the query "tina fey scar". Google Answers still holds the top spot, even though the page in question has about 1/10th the info about Tina Fey's scar as "The Tina Fey Scar Detective".

Meanwhile, Yahoo has it right. If you decide to search using Yahoo (and apparently there are at least 20 or 30 people who do so), you will get this blog as your #1 result for "Tina Fey Scar".

Hell yeah. "The Detective" owns Yahoo.

Now that I'm under the pressure that can only come from being #1, I better get my caboose on the track, hunting down clues that will finally explain the source of Fey's scar. In between those morsels of important information, I will serve up other Tina Fey news and notes. I don't want you to get bored while I research, after all.

I like the idea of buying stuff online. One reason I make a habit of doing that is because I can experiment with different stuff I probably wouldn't see during my regular shopping ventures. The downside to the whole "buy it with a click of the mouse" thing is the fact that sometimes it can be next to impossible to discern which products in a particular niche are worth a hoot and which ones are complete garbage.

Apparently, I'm not the only person with these concerns, because there's a website out there designed to make the buying/shopping experience easier for folks like me. It's TrustSource.com and it embodies a pretty cool concept.

Let's say you're going bald and you'd like to find a cure for your hair loss. You could buy some Rogaine. You could put your trust in Ron Popeil's hair in a can. Maybe one of those highly-touted solutions like provillus is on your list. How are you going to decide? TrustSource lays out all of the options in front of you with full descriptions, user reviews and other data to help you make a smart buy.

It's the same thing if you're looking for cellulite cream. These folks have busted down the whole industry and re-arranged it into easy-to-interpret pieces. Experiencing hot flashes as part of the menopause experience? No problem. TrustSource will give you some direction in finding the right remedy for you.

Online shopping doesn't have to be the equivalent of throwing darts blindfolded. You can get the information you need to make smart buys--organized intuitively and presented smartly. Why take chances when you can find the right stuff the right way the first time, right?

I found a few vintage Tina Fey photos at Unstirred and they spurred vivid flashbacks to the 80s. If you're a Tina watcher, you may have already seen these (if not, she's the anti-fox on the far right), but they're worth a second look because they provide us with a few valuable lessons...

• Tina Fey was a little on the less-than-monumentally hot side of things.

• Tina Fey was a fashion victim, just like everyone else from that era.

• Tina Fey's claim of a childhood source of the scar is buttressed by the photos. You can see hints of the scar in them.

• Tina Fey definitely does a better job with her hair these days. And she looks a wee bit tanner, too.

A true "before they were stars"/"while they were average if not slightly below-average looking kids" moment. Thanks to the fine folks at Unstirred for providing it.

We can all hope Tina Fey wins a few Emmys for "30 Rock", but even if she doesn't, we'll get to see her on stage. Fey wasn't able to wrestle the hosting job away from inevitable disappointment Ryan Seacrest, but she did land a gig as a presenter.

Some teary-eyed Emmy winner will get their trophy from Tina Fey!

According to The Canadian Press, Tina will be a hardware handler along with several other TV notables, including "30 Rock" talent and child-berater Alec Baldwin:

"Alec Baldwin, Tina Fey, Stephen Colbert and Kyra Sedgwick are among the celebrities added to the list of presenters for the 59th Primetime Emmy Awards. Baldwin and Fey star on NBC's "30 Rock," Colbert is host of "The Colbert Report" on Comedy Central, and Sedgwick stars on TNT's "The Closer." Other presenters announced Thursday by executive producer Ken Ehrlich include Marcia Cross, Ellen DeGeneres and Julia Louis-Dreyfus."

You can watch Tina Fey in "Mean Girls".

That probably doesn't shock you. The movie came out forever ago and it's not like it was only in limited release, a mere cult film that might be incredibly hard to find. So, you can watch Tina in "Mean Girls". As they used to say out on the playground, "no duh".

But wait, you can watch JUST Tina Fey in "Mean Girls". Some enterprising YouTubester went through the flick with a fine-toothed comb and excised all of Tina's screen time from the rest of the movie. It's a Tina Fey-only production.

The film doesn't hold up absent the rest of the cast, but for pure, unadulterated Fey... Well, it's definitely that:

MyFitnessPal.com is a great resource for anyone interested in adopting and maintaining a healthier lifestyle. Unlike many only health resources, MyFitnessPal is absolutely free. They'll never ask for a credit card and you'll never be strong-armed into making a purchase.

The site delivers, too. Of special interest is their easy-to-use calorie counter. It will tell you about the caloric content of the food you're eating and will also supply you with additional valuable nutritional information. When you combine free tools like that and their bmi calculator, it's easy to see why MyFitness pal gets such a rave review.

If you need a bmr calculator or just want more information about living a healthier life, MyFitnessPal is definitely worth a look.

Andy Samberg, the Saturday Night Live jokester du jour, is just about ready to roll out his first movie ("Hot Rod") and in the process he's giving plenty of interviews.

UnderGroundOnline ran their piece of Samberg's public relations junket recently. It's the usual stuff, for the most part, but it does include one Tina Fey reference. That's enough to earn it a commentary here at "The Tina Fey Scar Detective".

When discussing the butterflies in his gut during the SNL audition process, Samberg mentioned that having Tina chuckle at his work provided some much-needed confidence.

"I could hear Tina Fey laughing and some other people were laughing. I thought, "Cool!" It gives you confidence. Then they said they wanted to see me again a few weeks later. I came in and again got a few laughs, but the whole time, it's like doing a crappy stand-up gig at some hole in the wall. It's like, "Okay, let's get through this. I know these bits, so let's get through them." I'm told that when I did "out-of-breath jogger," which was the last thing I did, that Lorne laughed at that. You'd have to ask him to confirm whether he did or didn't."

That's the only Fey-related bit of the piece, but it is worth a read if you want a little insight on Samberg. You can read the whole thing here.

Tina Fey checked in with good ol' David Letterman last week. The August 23 appearance wasn't necessarily destined for the television hall of fame, but it's always good to see my favorite scar-bearer on the boob tube.

Anyway, I noticed that someone got around to putting the video up on YouTube. I know that many of you are just after scar info, but this is just as much a fansite (ooh, I hate that word) as it is an exercise in detective work. Thus, I am putting it out here for all Tina buffs to see.

Here tales of potty training!
View the new Tina Fey haircut!
Marvel at Letterman's Longevity!


Here it is...

Admission: I love the word "parallel". I especially enjoy that double "L" before a single "L" thing.

Now, to the story. More specifically, to a Heather Wood story at the Huffington Post in which she advises studio and network heads on preferred means of vaulting a few of her favorite women comedians/actresses to superstar status.

Among her favorites is Amy Sedaris (who I also think is a real talent). Anyway, Wood makes an interesting comparison between Amy and Tina Fey. Here's the remark:

"Amy Sedaris is Tina Fey... on crystal meth. She's got the same pleasant good-looks, same wicked sense of humor, same Second City credentials, but when it comes to performing, Sedaris prefers to go as far as taste and the FCC will allow."

I never really thought about comparing the two, but she makes a good point. The full post is an entertaining diversion. Check it out.

I'm sure that you know at least a few rudimentary facts about VoIP communication. You know, "voice over internet protocol"? Those cool phones that function over the net instead of involving cell towers, landlines, Ma Bell and all of the other stuff that have usually dominated the world of calling.

I'm sure that many of you are also NOT using VoIP technology--just like me.

At work, we've been slow to embrace VoIP, even though we have a broadband connection. Why? Because it sounds so complicated to set up and like a major inconvenience to operate. I get it: It's reliable. It's cheaper. Etc. We're just wary enough of new tech not to make the move.

That may be on the verge of changing though. Xpander is making these wildly flexible business phones by Nimbus readily available. Check this out: you can actually do the plug and play thing wherever you have a broadband connection. Plus, you can use web-based controls to run the phone system.

Nimbus VoIP phone systems give users maximum control with some serious efficiency and ease of use. Of course, you also get the hallmarks of the VoIP trade--unlimited US calling. Free Nimbus-Nimbus calls, etc.

If you've been letting the VoIP revolution pass you by, you might want to take another look at this exciting telephony trend.

A bass guitar discussion forum. A random entry about Saturday Night Live. A comment about Tina Fey. Things naturally move to the subject of Tina Fey's scars. Then... This:
"And of course the definitive page on Tina Fey's scar: http://www.bondcliff.net/content.mv?file=tinafey I think she's hotter than a forest fire in hell, so know this is in jest."

Immediately, I copy the link (it wasn't live) and head off to this "definitive" source of information. Nothing there. Nothing.

So, I'm wondering. Did Bondcliff.net know the secret of Tina Fey's scar. If so, why is the information now unavailable. What happened to it and the author. Is there something that happens to you (or maybe within you) when you finally find out what caused the scar?

We'll never know. Because it's gone.

I try to feel better. I tell myself that "this is in jest" part of the comment means that there was nothing too important there in the first place.

We'll never know. It's gone.

I found this remark in a series of comments on a blog post regarding "gaydar", which is a pretty damn random way to find grist for the "Tina Fey Scar Detective" mill, don't you think?

Anyway, it looks like the commenter in question may have stumbled upon an answer about Tina Fey's scar. No, don't get worked up. She doesn't know the cause of the scar. She does, however, have a very good explanation of why it is so seductive and interesting.

Here's the comment:

"Thailand girl- I don't think that's the case here. The point is more it's not whether he's gay or not. It's like Tina Fey's scar-she won't say what it's from which makes everyone WAYYYY more curious than if she did. But ultimately it's up to her (and HIM) to disclose info or not about themselves. I guess my point is- WHY are we (me and my office mates) SOOOO curious about this?"
Tina Fey's scar is interesting because we don't have an answer. That's believable.

But what does that mean about The Detective? If I find the answer, am I merely puncturing an entertaining balloon. Is it possible for one's fulfillment to decrease as they approach enlightenment? You get the idea.

The comments were originally written here. Although I didn't read the source blog in tremendous details, I'm sure it's AOK.

If you're reading this post, I'm willing to wager that you're a television fan. Most fans of tv shows tend to be film buffs, too, so I'd bet you fall into that category, as well.

So, even though this news isn't Tina Fey-centric, I think it has a high degree of applicability. I've discovered a groovy website where the film and television criticism runs deep, smart and fast. It's called Critics Rant and it's a "must" addition to your favorites list.

The idea behind Critics Rant is simple enough--let people climb up on a virtual soapbox to discuss (and yes, critique) new movies (they have great movie reviews there), DVD releases and television programming. They're creating a vibrant community of people sharing opinions and ideas.

If you dig TV and film, you should check out the site and its forums. They have a newsletter, they give away free DVDs to site members, and more. Heck, they even cover video games.

30 Rock is the critics' darling and the show appears ready to move full-steam ahead into its second season.
Not every post can be scar news. Sometimes, I need to mix things up with a little bit of plain ol' Tina Fey news. Here we go...

How does Tina Fey, the mastermind behind the program, hope to avoid a sophomore slump? The easy way out would be to keep things on a dead-even keel, but that's not the strategy. Instead, Fey plans to make a few changes in hopes of keeping the show's core audience while simultaneously expanding its appeal to those who haven't yet come down with a case of 30 Rock Fever.

Remote access (full story here) reports:

"She doesn’t want 30 Rock to be the next Arrested Development (even if in some ways it already is). That is to say, critical acclaim, which she’s got, will mean little if the show gets canceled, which it nearly was at various times last season. So Fey’s cutting down her scripts this season, letting the show breathe a little and continuing to grow as an actor. That recipe should make for an entertaining sophomore season."

Many of the Tina Fey scar theories involve events that may have happened in her young adult life. These rumors persist even though Fey has described the scarring as a "childhood" event.

Is it possible that Fey's remarks are less than accurate? Are the theories involving boyfriends in LA and adult stalkers possible? The photographic evidence indicates they are not.

Take a look at the high school photo of Tina Fey, which you can find at Stereogum. Although the image lacks high-definition and isn't necessarily Fey's most photogenic moment, a discerning viewer can make out the presence of the scar.

Thus, the scar must have originated at least a few months prior to the high school photo. Those who claim the scarring was an adult matter appear to be incorrect.

NBC isn't the world's biggest YouTube supporter, as you probably know. However, they did decide to use the net's most popular video site as a means of drumming up attention/interest in the upcoming second season of Tina Fey's "30 Rock".

NBC created a "Best of Tina Fey" video and made it publicly available via YouTube.



The following text accompanied the mini-flick:

"Check out the funniest clips of Tina Fey from SNL's Weekend Update...and don't miss Tina in her hilarious comedy "30 Rock" along with Alec Baldwin & Tracy Morgan every Thursday night at 8:30/7:30c only on NBC."

If you are reading this right now instead of watching the video, you should rethink your actions.

I used to think that a trip to Mexico meant getting tanked during spring break with a bunch of other college kids or sneaking across the border to visit houses of ill repute and/or semi-legal pharmacies. Boy, I was Wrong (with an intentionally capitalized "W").

Today, Mexico has become a leading destination for discerning travelers with great taste. Case in point: Karisma Resorts. These folks run multiple resort properties along the so-called Riviera Maya and they are amazing.

White sand beaches. Top-notch surroundings. All of the extras and special touches you'd expect from the very best vacation properties. This is good stuff. If you've had a narrow view of Mexico, it's time to broaden your horizons.

Oh, and you should probably prepare you belly, too. No, not for Montezuma's revenge. That's another passe stereotype. The Karisma resorts in Mexico are operated with discriminating palates in mind. Their All Inclusive Mexico Vacations include dining experiences that would satisfy any gourmet (or gourmand, for that matter). Karisma prides itself on offering a selection of meals and treats made with the tastes of knowledgeable foodies in mind.

It's time to change your perspective on Mexican travel. Karisma proves that a trip south of the Rio Grande can be as well-appointed and luxurious as anything you'll find anywhere on the planet. Ole!

An old blog entry contains one line about the origins of Tina Fey's scar. The comment is actually parenthetical, too. It provides a potential 4-word answer to the riddle that's been haunting me for so long.

"in a car accident"

No corroboration. No real support for the claim found within the old post's text. Another dead end? Maybe. I'll keep digging, though.

Who knows, maybe it was a childhood car accident. Maybe the parents get "bummed" because one of them feels responsible for the accident.

I'm on the job. Someday, we'll know....

I recently commented on the fact that "The Tina Fey Scar Detective" was the #4 result at Google when one queries for "Tina Fey scar".

That information is no longer correct.

Snopes has dropped. The Associated Content bio slipped a notch, too. Now, at #2, "The Tina Fey Scar Detective".

Second. I'm celebrating my near-victory.

I'm probably trapped in the 2-spot forever, because a "Google Answers" deal on the whole issue holds the top slot. Google Answers undoubtedly has enough Google Mojo to stay on top for awhile.

In the meantime, I'm gathering steam. And visitors. That's making it more imperative that I dig up the True Story Behind Tina Fey's Scar.

The eyes of the world are upon me. I better get back to work. Pronto.

Silver and gold aren't just a great way to house your diamond bling, kids. They're also a serious financial tool for smart investors looking for a way to build the perfect portfolio.

Think about it. Name one commodity that's retained its value since ancient Egypt? Tough to do. Salt was king back in the old days, but you can buy a bucket of Mortons for a few cents at the grocery store these days. Only gold and silver--precious metals--have maintained value for all that time.

Precious metals are a solid hedge against change and instability. They hold value even during the most turbulent times. That's one reason why experts laud the inclusion of precious metals in smart investment portfolios and one reason why the Monex Deposit Company has been a real asset to thousands of investors over the decades.

MDC can help one acquire precious metals and will even work with clients on safe storage offers. If you're serious about your financial improvement, they should certainly be on your radar.

The same gold bullion pirates craved remains valuable and desirable to investors today. Think about making precious metals part of your personal financial plan.

I've spent countless seconds investigating the origins of Tina Fey's scar, to no avail. Sure we have leads (ranging from Stalker Boyfriend to Evil Razor Man to War of 1812), but none of them have really put us any closer to The Truth.

I've spent time digging through lesser-read and even lesser-known resources in hopes of finding an answer. It then occurred to me that I've neglected mainstream news sources. What if one of the Big Boys had spilled the scar beans long ago and the information was just sitting there for all to see. It could be that my more in-the-know resources were too cool for school and had overlooked the obvious.

Enter USA Today. Not literally, of course. That would be like some weird Ah-Ha video and I'm not recommending that. Figuratively. What does USA Today have to say about Tina Fey's riddle of a scar?
"They love her glasses, which imbue her with a smart-girl sexiness but in fact serve a practical purpose: they help her read the cue cards on "Update." And they gossip about the origins of the mysterious scar on the left side of her face. Fey won't say how she got it except to mention that it happened during her childhood."
That's right. No help. None. Nunca. Nil. Zero.

Back to the back streets and dark alleyways of the information world in search of information about how Tina Fey got her scar. Thanks for nothing, USA Today.

When you don't have scar news, you might as well report on Tina Fey's torso. Thus, here I am commenting on a DeadBrain ode to Tina Fey's breasts.

The author got a glimpse of her chest during a viewing of "Mean Girls" and developed an immediate, healthy appreciation for the orbs. As the photo accompanying this post so clearly illustrates, there IS something to like about them, huh?

I don't want to beat a dead horse (other objects warrant a beating following discussions of this sort), so I will spare you my own extended evaluation of Ms. Fey's sexiness. Instead, I'll just share a bit of the DeadBrain assessment:

Read all about it/them here.

"She's no longer just a super-talented, hard-working, ultra-respectable broad.
She's a certified hottie with dynamite cans.

World domination – here comes Tina, in all her knockering, nipply glory!"

LandsOfAmerica.com, is a leader in marketing rural properties. If you're interested in rural Land for sale, LandsOfAmerica is the perfect place to find it. If you want to sell property, their 250+ site network attracts over 2 million eyeballs every month.

Tecomate? They're owned, in part, by famous TV personality Jeff Foxworthy. Foxworthy is anchoring "The Bucks of Tecomate", a 5X weekly TV show that will help spread the word about the company. Tecomate is in the wildlife habitat business. They help property owners create havens for wildlife and offer consulting services.

So, we have one company that markets rural real estate. We have another company that provides a spectacular service to those in the recreational rural property segment. Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Partnership.

And it's happening. Tecomate has selected LandsOfAmerica to promote recreational real estate in that part of the marketplace. Judging by the early results reported upon by the folks at LandsOfAmerica, the marriage is working out wonderfully, too.

Gotta love it when a deal works out so well for everyone--both parties involved and the consumers of their goods and services!